I was one of those awful mothers this morning.
Master 7 year old woke up in a bad mood which then made me in a bad mood because he was being cranky and difficult.
Requests for him to have his breakfast, get dressed and get ready for school were met with smart comments which really irritated me.
There were tears and tantrums because his older brother was looking at him the wrong way, or was laughing at him, or was generally breathing in his direction.
After finally getting out the door this morning and arriving at school the tears started – again. He realised he had forgotten his hat, which older brother proudly told him was on the floor in his bedroom. There was now hysteria over elder brother’s conspiracy theory to deliberately make him forget his hat.......argh!!!! After a quick check of his school bag I didn’t have the heart to mention the library bag which I realised wasn’t in there – it was library day too.
So after trying to unsuccessfully console him in 3 seconds flat with a quick “you’ll be right. See if there’s a hat in lost property you can borrow – bye, gotta go, running late for work – blah blah blah”, I jumped in the car and headed for the next drop-off point which is family day care for master 2.
I think I’d barely got around the corner when the guilt started creeping in and by the time I got to the office I was feeling terrible. I started thinking about the craziness of our family life. Too much to do and just no time to fit even half of it in. I also started to think back to when my eldest was in Year 1 (he’s in year 6 now). I’m sure I never yelled out “have you got this, have you got that” as we ran out the door. I checked what day it was and therefore what was needed for the day and made sure it was in his bag. I was so organised and as a result he never went to school without hats, library bags, signed notes etc.
So why do I expect master 7 year old to look after himself? Why don’t’ I pack his bag like I did for his brother at that age? What on earth will I be like by the time my 2 year old goes to school? OMG – now I feel even worse.
Am I the only one that becomes a worse mum with each additional child they have?